A Paula Dean Christmas

If you have ever met Pancake (my 1st born dog) you would probably comment on her beautiful hair. She has long, flowing, Fabio-like, silky hair that makes her look like the worlds tiniest, and most beautiful, Cousin It.

Most people think that I spend hours a day brushing her auburn locks into perfection but the truth is I rarely touch it. First of all, Pancake HATES to have her hair brushed… I mean HAAATTTEEEES it. She barks and wiggles and bites and whines and makes it almost impossible to deal with her. In addition, her hair gets so tangled and matted it takes an act of congress, and the aid of Vidal Sassoon himself, to get it brushed out.

So, a couple times each year I attempt to wrangle the (8lb) beast and brush her dang coat out. It is complete hell for her and for me. She may be small but she is very forceful when she is angry and the brat plays dirty. So I have to hold her down with one hand and force  her into all kinds of weird positions to try and get all of the tangles. She is also a huge baby and every time I even slightly pull her hair she screeches like I broke her leg and then just falls apart and does this weird tornado-crocodile-spin move and gyrates in such a way that I can barely hold her down.
Anyway, it’s torture. So, this process happened last week and it took me 3 or 4 days of sitting for several hours at a time to get the job done. Once I was finished she was the most beautiful I have ever seen her. Her silly locks would blow in the wind as she walked across the floor and she totally knew how pretty she looked. She was working it!

As I went to grab my camera to capture her in all of her glory she went outside to show off to Brad who was cooking on the patio. Apparently she walked up just as he had unwrapped an entire stick of butter and godonlyknowswhathappenedthen, but, he dropped the butter in her hair. IN HER HAIR! And of course when a pound of butter dropped on her back she completely freaked out and ran inside screaming. Then Brad started running after her. And the more he chased her, the more freaked out she got and then they were running circles around my kitchen. The faster her little cubster legs ran the more the butter became entangled in her perfect hair. So I hear the commotion and join in the chase and now the dogs are all barking, Pancake is covered in butter, Brad is screaming “Broken Arrow” and all hell just breaks loose.

When we were finally able to corral the pup she was so flustered that she had melted most of the butter and looked like more like an oil spill seagull than a Pomeranian with perfect hair

Needless to say, for Christmas she is getting a day at the doggie day spa.

No comments:

Post a Comment